I'd like to consider myself an optimistic person.
People tend to think that just because you choose to "focus on the positive" that somehow you don't see reality. It's not that at all - understand those optimistic people made a CHOICE to focus on the positive of the situation and what they can personally do about it moving forward.
Negativity and bad things happen to us all - nobody's exempt from life's trials and tribulations despite what you see on social media and what people choose to tell you.
So here are some actionable tips next time you find yourself in a shitty mood:
1. Find somewhere to clear your head, relax and take a breath.
Go to the bathroom if you have to... fuckin breathe. Even it's just for a couple minutes - this HELPS sometimes you gotta remove yourself from the environment or person that's pissing you off.
2. Have a conversation with a close friend or family member about the situation. (or a therapist)
Sometimes you just gotta get it out and vent. I understand... normally the people in your life will offer you some sort of solution how to handle the situation better or how to move forward.
If they do, TAKE THE ADVICE (if you trust them) - cause clearly if you had the answers... you wouldn't be so pissed off. Also, if you keep having the same problem with the same situations/people... that shit can get draining REAL fast... calling your people ALL the time - so I'ma need you to bust a move and HANDLE IT (Olivia Pope style). I know people like to wallow in a cesspool of whoa is me but I'ma be straight up real - the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results.
Long story short - don't drain your people - act out a solution or just exit the situation.
3. PAY ATTENTION!!! YOU ALREADY KNEW OR JUST WASN'T PEEPING THE SIGNS !!
****Most problems - with the exception of death from old age - either come from YOUR OWN negligence or just come from dealing with other people bullshit. Straight up.****
This is where I keep it 1000% with yall and really get in my bag.
Let's keep it a buck - at some point YOU the person reading this made a choice. You made a choice to put yourself in a situation where the outcome of a situation is pissing you the fuck off.
The first thing you NEED to do if you expect to get anywhere is to TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for your part in the fucked-up-ness that is your situation.
- Nobody made you spend all your money in the wrong places.
- Nobody made you fuck that guy or girl raw who you knew was a hoe and end up with chlamydia.
- Nobody made you take that job or career who you hate but "it pays the bills" and nobody made you stay there until it sucked out your entire soul.
- Nobody made you choose your friends (who some of them you don't even like) or your significant other.
- Nobody made you indulge in dog shit for food for weeks, months or years.
- Nobody made you do drugs, drink alcohol, or smoke cigarettes.
- Nobody made you not ever pick up a book after college.
- Nobody made you have a kid. (Don't blame on the pussy / dick neither.)
- ETC ETC ETC
Oh, so you mad??? Why?? Your choices lead you to this.
My point is - NOBODY MADE YOU DO SHIT. Again - you made a choice!! CHOOSE BETTER.
We all choose wrong sometimes throughout life - it's how we handle our choices moving forward that determines where we end up.
Let's get to the second part of this. OTHER PEOPLE'S BULLSHIT
First things first... Let me start with THIS.
EVERYBODY IS CRAZY AND HAS THEIR SHIT.
Everybody. Every-fucking-body. Everybody. Everybody. I had to say it four times cause media and disney movies got yall WAY too gassed up like people ain't crazy af out here and shit aint really REAL in these streets. Aint no such thing as normal.
Lemme clear some things up:
- Yes people cheat on their wives and husbands, girlfriends and boyfriends.
- Yes people be in church praising God on Sunday and doing the most craziest shit that would make your jaw drop Monday-Saturday.
- Yes people are functioning drug addicts and alcoholics
- Yes mental illness is REAL and people really be depressed / wanting to die
- Yes dudes be gay with wives and girlfriends (and vice versa)
- Yes people present themselves as rich or popping on social media and don't have a dollar to they name.
- Yes people have open relationships / other relationships other than monogamous ones
- Yes people do be full time hoes and hoettes out here
- Yes people are scared and very insecure
- Yes there are people who live happy lives and they MIND THEY BUSINESS.
- Yes nothing is what it seems.
Now that I cleared that out the way..... you really gotta pick your poison and decide who's bullshit and stuff you wanna deal with.
Understand: The people you pick to have in your life is critical.
Everyone you know comes with the good, the bad, and the ugly.
If you take a step back and really look at things from an aerial perspective you realize: That most other people's problems (unless your married / have a kid with them) have NOTHING to do with you. Help and be there for your people but never to the determent of yourself. If you aren't careful though, people WILL by proximately drag you into their problems and bullshit and that my friends.... if how you end up in fucked up situations with you being pissed off.
At some point people show you who they are, what they're about and if you're paying attention for long enough - you'll be able to see their character. From there you can look at them and ask yourself - does this person have the qualities that I want in my life?
Let it be known: Have standards and always remember just because they cross your path doesn't mean they are worthy of being in your life.
Like I said... everyone comes with something but it's up to you to make choices that benefit you and to take responsibility for those choices. People DO show you who they are - just pay attention to the signs.
Key: A lot of life is just handling shit and just being smart with how you move out here.
Learn how to control your environment and don't let it control you.